The author recounts a life marked by a stark duality: excelling academically and professionally while grappling with intense isolation and an inability to form deep social connections. Despite being Dux of her high school and achieving a double-degree, she has never experienced a romantic relationship. Diagnosed with autism at 28, she began to understand her social anxieties, sensory sensitivities, and the struggles that have pervaded her life. The timely diagnosis provides clarity for her feelings of difference and the challenges she faced growing up, particularly as a woman in a society that typically overlooks or misconstrues female presentations of autism.
The narrative touches on the alarming statistic that nearly 80% of autistic females remain undiagnosed by age 18. Historically, autism has been characterized as a predominantly male condition, resulting in far fewer diagnoses among women. However, emerging research suggests that autism in women is more prevalent than previously thought, emphasizing the necessity for a more nuanced understanding of how autism manifests in females. Unfortunately, diagnostic criteria remain heavily male-centric, leaving many women undiagnosed and unsupported. This disparity highlights the critical need for awareness and change in diagnostic approaches for women’s health concerning autism.
Following her diagnosis, the author sought support through the National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS), eager to find resources to alleviate her social isolation. However, her experience highlights systemic flaws within the NDIS framework, which, despite pledging to prioritize participant choices and individual needs, often fails to recognize the specific requirements of autistic women. During her application process, she faced skepticism when requesting therapies related to her trauma and social anxiety, such as psychosexual therapy. This illustrates a disconnect between the realities of women’s experiences with autism and the rigid classifications that inform disability support services.
The author reveals a deep-seated issue of medical misogyny within autism treatment, resulting in the overlooking of women’s unique needs. Despite being well-versed in disability studies, she realized her struggles were common among autistic women, who often find themselves needing different forms of support than their male counterparts. The responses she received from NDIS planners reflect a widespread misunderstanding of how autism can affect women’s physical, emotional, and social well-being. She highlights her need for therapy aimed at building confidence and addressing trauma, rather than generic supports that may not serve her specific difficulties.
The struggles faced by autistic women extend beyond mental health, touching on sexual well-being and safety. Research indicates that these individuals generally report lower sexual functioning and are more vulnerable to sexual violence compared to autistic men. Disturbingly, she mentions that 90% of autistic women are victims of sexual assault—a statistic underscoring the urgent need for tailored support systems. The author personally aligns with the statistics, indicating a shared experience among many autistic women who navigate a world that often disregards their needs.
In her reflection, the author expresses the overwhelming difficulty faced in accessing meaningful support and connection, despite her qualifications and understanding of her situation. Everyday situations become challenging; from struggling to communicate in noisy environments to grappling with her history of trauma during medical appointments. Through her poignant experiences, she evokes feelings of isolation and envy towards social norms that remain elusive to her. Ultimately, her narrative is a compelling call for greater recognition and understanding of women’s autism, the nuances of their experiences, and the substantial changes needed in the support systems meant to assist them.