The inquest into the deaths of Lilie James and Paul Thijssen revealed troubling details about their relationship. Thijssen was accused of controlling behavior, tracking his ex-girlfriend’s movements, and pressuring her to marry him. He was described as suffocating her with constant attention, even having gelato delivered to her to keep tabs on her location. The relationship ended when the young woman blocked him on social media and he flew to Australia unannounced, causing further distress.
Thijssen’s behavior became increasingly erratic and concerning, as he was seen peering into his ex-girlfriend’s house in the early hours of the morning and had a restraining order threatened against him by her father. He lied about his reasons for being in Australia, forging documents to obtain a working visa that he did not actually use for its intended purpose. The stressors in his life, as referenced by his parents, were not fully disclosed, leaving the investigation with limited information on potential triggers for his actions.
The inquest heard that Thijssen’s erratic behavior culminated in the tragic events at Diamond Bay, where he and James fell to their deaths. Thijssen’s backpack contained handmade vouchers from his ex-girlfriend and his other phone, leading investigators to believe he disposed of some incriminating evidence before his death. Limited communication records between the two due to the use of Snapchat further complicated the investigation.
Lilie James was described as a vibrant and accomplished young woman, active in water polo coaching and studying at university. Her friends spoke highly of her confidence, calm demeanor, and caring nature. Thijssen, on the other hand, was portrayed as a troubled individual whose controlling and deceitful behavior raised red flags among those close to him. Despite potential warning signs and stressors in his life, the full extent of Thijssen’s mental state and motivations remains unclear.
The inquest underscored the need for open communication and transparency in identifying potential risks and red flags in relationships. The thorough police investigation shed light on the disturbing dynamics between Thijssen and his ex-girlfriend, highlighting the dangers of controlling behavior and emotional manipulation. The tragic loss of two young lives serves as a reminder of the importance of seeking support and intervention in situations of domestic or relationship violence.
If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence or in need of support, resources such as the National Sexual Assault, Domestic and Family Violence Counselling Service, Lifeline, and Beyond Blue are available for help. The inquest into the deaths of Lilie James and Paul Thijssen serves as a poignant reminder of the devastating consequences of unhealthy relationships and the importance of seeking help in times of need.